Ode to Target

I'm totally bored sitting in my hotel room in Indy. I made the mistake of drinking diet coke at dinner and now cannot fall asleep to save my life. So here it is 12:55 AM and what better way to spend this sleepless night than sharing my Sunday experience at Target... I know brace yourself for some good old fashion boredom. It's not too late to hit the back button on your browser and save yourself from my over caffeinated body that is in desperate need for sleep.

So my first mistake was going to Target on the Sunday before school starts. By the way Sunday people at Target - you cannot stand at the front entrance of the store and not expect a traffic jam to occur. Then you want to give dirty looks when people bump into you or try and get around you without disturbing your conversation. I don't care if it's been all summer since you've seen your friends, move to the side... There is an entire store of space and you somehow think standing in the front is the best place for you.

The dollar isle of Target, a great idea and an isle I can't pass up, however it's put in the wrong spot. Again at the front entrance were people tend to lolly gag.

Why is it out of 500 carts at the front of the store I get the one that didn't work. The faster I wanted to push it the slower it moved or didn't move. Apparently the cart had something against me but I would not let it defeat me. AKA I was too stubborn and lazy to get another one. The harder I pushed (I guess I was thinking it would move better) the more it would come to a dead stop and send me flying forward. I felt like I was in stop and go traffic the way my body would come to a crashing halt out of no where. I think my ribs were bruised after this trip due to the number of times they slammed into the cross bar. This cart and I were quite a site walking through Target. I pushed - it stopped, I pulled - it didn't budge. I got a few funny looks as I kicked the wheel and mumbled a few things under my breath (which shall not be repeated).

The cleaning isle was packed full of kids and parents purchasing things for dorm rooms. All I needed was soap but that was a 20 minute ordeal just trying to get down that isle. Partly because of the stop and go motion of the cart but mainly because of the people. Although I will say it was rather cute watching a father, mother, and son shop and the dad was looking around for brooms and dorm size trash cans. But that sweetness only lasted for a brief moment and then it became annoying because he kept cutting me off trying to get to his wife. Or maybe it was the cart stopping me from moving. Either way each time I came across the family I somehow got stopped.

Finally I had my 10 items I went into Target for and now it was time to check out. Apparently I had the same idea 100 other people had because each line had at least 4 or 5 families. You would have thought it was Christmas in that place. Then as I walked outside with the cart in tow it wouldn't move on the concrete. It just decided to stop and not move and I'm pretty sure the guys walking by me started laughing at the site of me trying to move this thing on wheels. Even though I had a giant 25 pack of toilet paper and a 10 pack of paper towels I decided it was time to ditch the cart. As I'm walking to the car all I could think was Lord please don't let the toilet paper or paper towel packing rip. Please just don't let them go rolling out and into the parking lot. I really don't need anymore embarrassment right now. Thankfully we all made it to the car with no mishaps.

I will say this - the only good thing about a bad cart is it kept me from walking around and buying more than was on my list. So for that my checkbook is thankful, but my ego not so much.

See I tried to warn you above about the boredom but you didn't listen. I'm just jealous that after reading this you are falling asleep and somehow I'm still not.